Hello hello!
How are you??? I've missed connecting with you! It took longer than I thought it would to get into this again, but I'm back! And the reason I'm writing about stuckness is because I was - for about a month!
It's like the less I did, the less I wanted to do. And finally, I just decide to take action. Usually I wait for inspired action, but this time I just got sick of myself. Haha.
I actually haven't been doing nothing. I've been a sponge in my learnings again because I pretty much took the whole summer off that stuff. Joe Hudson is someone I'm enjoying and is what inspired this inSight. 😊
What is stuck? It's a feeling. So if you don't feel stuck, are you?
You're stuck in tons of ways that don't make you feel stuck. You're stuck with gravity and the weather. But that doesn't make you feel stuck does it? We can feel stuck in ways where we actually aren't stuck. There is a variation to stuckness. One is a problem you want to solve, the other is I'm trapped.
You might feel trapped in a marriage, trapped in depression, trapped in a way of thinking. So you are trying to solve vs. don't know how to get out.
What's a little step you can do? (Not to get all the way right away). Allow yourself the time to feel where you are. Where you don't understand and you don't know what to do. Sit with that.
This gives you the space to integrate new knowledge. "We call it good if you're not resisting it and call it stuck if we're resisting it. " Nice Joe. That landed.
So if you feel stuck, stay there a while. Be in the unknown. Be in the place you don't know what to do. This space allows for the epiphany to enter. So get excited something is coming or be fearful you don't know.
Process:
Thought: I'm not getting ______ done.
(Insert the area you're feeling stuck. Growing business, losing weight, new friends/romance, handling finances).
Feeling: stuck, scared
Action: do nothing
Ok. Feel that. Allow some space.
(give these feelings 60 - 90 seconds)
New thought: I'm open to what's coming
New feeling: excitement
New action: do something (do one small thing)!
Feeling trapped can feel like being oppressed and under that is anger. Don't resist the stuckness! To not allow yourself the freedom of being where you are, actually will make it last longer.
So ok, I'm stuck. I wonder when this will pass? (What you resist persists, so you're adding more stuckness if you resist it). Remember to feel it.
Through September I had to say to myself, "oh, hello stuckness. There you are. I see you. I understand why you feel this way. It's ok." (That's all there is to feeling a feeling).
Joe says being stuck is a form of attacking yourself. Stuckness is trying to avoid an emotional state - most likely the removal of love or getting in trouble. So attack yourself instead of being hurt by another. If it wasn't ok being you as a child (for all the various reasons) you get stuck as an adult trying to be yourself. There is fear there.
So maybe you're not stuck. You just have choices to make.
Are you stuck or do you just feel stuck?
For me, I was scared. I had stepped out for a couple months. I second guessed myself a little. Does anyone even care what I have to say? People are fine. Does anyone even want to 'be better?' I allowed myself to feel what came up. I gave my fears space to show up. And then I remembered, I can do hard things. I can move through my discomfort. Because on the other side of the fear is the joy I feel when I learn, teach and stretch myself into the unknown! Now I'm excited again!!
This is my wish for you - if you feel stuck.
All my love!
K 💛
